How Dad Can Help Keep the Peace

Dads are in a unique position to help ease the tension between mom and daugther

"When a daughter hits puberty, her relationship with her mom is almost guaranteed to deteriorate. This strained relationship is actually a good sign of normal development, even if it might be occasionally painful for parents. But the good news is that dads are in a unique position to ease tensions between mom and daughter, says Dr. Dana Dorfman, a therapist to families and teens for 30 years."

-Lizzy Francis, Fatherly, "How to Help A Teenage Daughter Get Along With Her Mom."

In this article, Francis gives practical tips for how dads can help diffuse the conflict between mother and daughter. Here are her tips:

1) Understanding that this is a normal part of development. Because of gender similarity, daughter will lash out at mom.

2) Remind mom that it's because her daughter feels safe at home is why she lashes out.

3) Don't take the bait! Stay calm when a teenager acts out. Remind mom of this! If either parent reacts and argues back, he or she should apologize.

4) Once the dust settles, go talk to your daughter. You can still be a listening ear, be empathetic without taking her side. Remember that it is really HARD being a teenager.

5) Even though you should stay calm, you should have hard lines that you are not willing to cross i.e. disrespect.

6) Understand that being a mom to a teenage girl is HARD. Make sure that mom is getting the self care that she needs i.e. alone time, exercise, date nights, time with friends, etc.

For more tips, read the rest of the article:


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